by Hannah Hungerford
Facebook is outdated, useless, and just plain stupid nowadays. With Twitter,Instagram, and Snapchat, the use for the website in general has started to become obsolete. It’s practically impossible to get rid of your Facebook account, as deactivating is essentially a 13 step process that forces you to rethink your life decisions.
Not only does Facebook advertise to you every other website and every product you have ever looked at, but it also leaves you more annoyed than you started.
Besides the endless annoying posts from your long lost relatives, bigoted high school friends, and minion memes, hoax posts are now clogging up everyone’s timelines.
The revival of the “Facebook privacy statement” from 2011 started again last week with the posting of:
“I do not give Facebook or any entities associated with Facebook permission to use my pictures, information or posts, both past and future. By this statement, I give notice to Facebook [that] it is strictly forbidden to disclose, copy, distribute or take any other action against me based on this profile and/or its contents. The content of this profile is private and confidential information. The violation of privacy can be punished by law (UCC 1-308-1 1-308-103 and the Rome Statute). Note: Facebook is now a public entity. All members must post a note like this. If you prefer, you can copy and paste this version. If you do not publish a statement at least once, it will be tactically [sic] allowing the use of your photos, as well as the information contained in the profile status updates. DO NOT SHARE, you must copy and paste.”
Does no one on Facebook understand that this is fake?
It’s literally the same as those chain letters that everyone used to send when they were 11 and had a flip phone, and the messages would be so large that they would send in 7 parts. Even before chain texts became a popular form of communication, chain emails existed and ruined all of our lives. A person living in 2009 couldn’t go a day without receiving an email along the lines of “if you don’t send this to 10 people by midnight, a ghost will attack you in your sleep.”
We all lived through this era, which is part of the reason it is so shocking that everyone, absolutely everyone, is falling for this ridiculous hoax.
There is no one who isn’t on Facebook: your grandmother, your parents, your professors, and your 8 year old niece all have accounts. Who wants to live in a world where everything you post can be judged by your 5th grade teacher, and your school? Not me.
People are now writing parody posts of the “Facebook Privacy Statements” which, while meant to make light of the situation as a whole, are just as ridiculous and equally as annoying as the original post.
It’s all of these things, especially the viral privacy statement reposts, that have lead me to my decision of deleting my Facebook once and for all, and freeing myself of this awful website. (I desperately want to, but I won’t, as stalking my friend’s profile pictures is one of my favorite past times.)
Hannah Hungerford is a Staff Writer for The Nine Ways of Knowing.
Images courtesy of Forbes.com and Hannah Hungerford.