Why Fall is Actually the Worst Season

by Laura K. Garrison

Fall isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

Over the past week, there’s been an increasing chill in the air signaling the end of summer and the inevitable arrival of the fall. You’ve undoubtedly been inundated with Facebook posts, blog articles, and gleeful reminders from that friend who was wearing scarves in early September why fall is the best season. For summer babies and sun worshipers such as myself, this couldn’t be further from the truth: the beginning of autumn marks the steady decline to the bitter cold of winter. Sorry Internet, fall is actually the worst season.

1. The Pumpkin Spice Latte is back…and you shouldn’t be excited.

Every September, Starbucks rolls out its beloved Pumpkin Spice Latte (or PSL for those dedicated fans). I’ll admit that I’ve never tried a Pumpkin Spice Latte, and probably never will as I’m one of those rare breed of people who absolutely hate coffee. Regardless, John Oliver of HBO’s Last Week Tonight recently did an excellent takedown of the PSL over Columbus Day weekend. I stand vindicated. And while I do enjoy a nice slice of pumpkin pie after Thanksgiving dinner, there’s no doubt that the trend of arbitrarily putting pumpkin in popular foods is getting out of hand.

2. To be honest, the leaves aren’t even that great anymore.

Born and raised in the Northeast, I distinctly remember the breathtaking beauty of the leaves changing every fall during my childhood. In recent years, however, I’ve become increasingly underwhelmed by the annual display of leaves in the Hudson Valley. Whether this is the result of climate change or just my cynical, jaded perspective is up to debate. But one thing’s for sure: eventually those leaves will fall to the ground and leave the trees bare. When they crunch under our feet, they become another metaphorical reminder of our own short lives. Enjoy the existential crisis while you can!

3. It may be sweater weather, but that also means it’s getting colder out.

The changing weather represents an opportunity to expand our closets and dig out our favorite sweaters/boots/jackets/scarves, but it’s always sad to pack up my sundresses, Daisy Dukes, and collection of sandals and wedges for the next six months. While I love being able to throw on my leggings for a comfy day in class, I also have to accept the fact that the temperature is dropping, a subtle reminder that winter is just around the corner. When the snow starts to fall, I just want to crawl into bed and hibernate until late April.

4. The world is a dark, dark place.

There’s no disappointment quite like walking out of class at 5:30pm and discovering that the sun has already gone down. It always seems much later than it really is in the fall (thanks, Day Light Savings), which can be hard to deal with when there are final papers, projects, and studying for finals to get done. Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is definitely a thing, with fewer hours of sunlight having a real psychological impact. I for one can’t wait to need my sunblock again.

5. Help I’m trapped inside and I can’t get out.

Now in November, it’s too cold and windy for long walks and apple picking. The beach, that heavenly oasis of warmth and fun, is no longer an option for escape. It’s too cold to organize a pickup game of insert your favorite sport here, and no one wants to picnic or barbecue when they can’t feel their toes. I’m already going stir crazy just thinking about it.

Laura K. Garrison is a senior at Barnard and Senior Editor for The Nine Ways of Knowing.

Image courtesy of Flickr.

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One thought on “Why Fall is Actually the Worst Season

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